tlcorbin
Hazel CastilloMorning Coffee Thoughts
July 28th 2008 18:21
How about a quip in the form of a test?
When ordering coffee at a shop, what size do you generally prefer?
a. Extra Large
b. Obscenely Large
c. Send me to heaven (XXX) Large
What do you enjoy most about coffee?
a. The aroma and flavor
b. The racing pulse
c. The chest pains
Finish this sentence: When I'm not drinking coffee, I'm...
a. ...pining about coffee
b. ...planning a coffee break and revolution
c. ...eating used coffee grounds
What kind of bean do you prefer?
a. Jamaican Ganja
b. Guatemalan Cocoa
c. I don't care, gimme a hot shot of caffeine: NOW
Finish this sentence: Coffee makes me...
a. A twitching sex partner
b. Wanna pee like a race horse
c. Stutter like I type
If a waitperson asks: Would like a coffee refill, you reply . . .
a. Hell yes, . . .please
b. Hook me up intravenously
c. Well, duh
An extremely cute person asks you if they can share your coffee: You respond with . . .
a. Sure, but get nekked first
b. No, thank you, I’m anal
c. Threaten broken limbs
What best describes coffee in your world?
a. My salvation
b. Living La Vida Mocha
c. Energizer Caffeine Bunny
How close is the nearest coffee shop to your home?
a. I live in the stock room
b. My RV is in the parking lot
c. I'm homeless, I spent all my money on mocha’s
What's the worst part about drinking coffee?
a. An empty cup
b. Discovering it’s tea
c. Repeat the question, I haven't slept in four days...
Scoring:
All A answers get 10 points.
All B answers get 5 points.
All C answers get 2 points.
Score:
100 - 50 = You’re a caffeine junky
50 - 22 = You love your brew
20 = You’re a chocolate sippin sissy
Well, there ya go friends. Want some spiced tea and a salamander dip bagel?
Raven
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